adrian is rad



Filed under: — adrian @ 9:57 am

So the other day Andyl was talking how if it was possible to eat a food bar that had all the nutrition he needed, he’d switch over and eat only that. First we thought of Clif Bars or Balance Bars. As you can see, though, you’d have to eat a lot of those and you’d end up getting too much of some things and not enough of others. I then searched for “food bars” and what do you know? Mayday food bars! They’re approved by the US Coast Guard! If you eat five four-hundred calorie servings a day, you’re pretty much set on most of the things your body needs. Andy ordered some and they arrived yesterday. Before I’d gotten home he cracked them open and eaten two servings as his dinner. I decided to try one. They come in these blocks that look like little chunks of coffee cake. They even have an apple-cinnamon sort of taste. The thing is, they are dense. Imagine saw dust that’d been compacted by a 10-ton press. They also have no moisture in them at all. They don’t have a lot of sodium so they’re advertised as “non-thirst provoking” but I was glad I had some water (and soda) to go along with my chunk. I ate this piece and about 3/4 the way though BAM! it just hit me. It’s deceiving because of it’s small size, but this is a LOT of food and it just slams into your stomach. I was full for hours afterwards.

I offered Andy $20 and the cost of the mayday food bars if he’d only eat those for a week. Dylan made the same offer.

8 Responses to “mayday”

  1. Milkshake Says:

    I once ate nothing but peanut butter sandwiches for an entire week and it was pretty much the hardest thing I’ve ever done. This sounds worse.

  2. dolphio Says:

    So I’m guessing he didn’t take the challenge?

    Also, what’s the Saturated Fat content of those per serving? I’ve been looking for something to eat before playing racquetball, but most of the bars out there either have a ton of sugar, or 5-6g of saturated fat in them, which I certinately don’t need in a “nutrition” bar.

  3. adrian Says:

    He hasn’t taken the deal yet. The offer has been upped to include a nice dinner at the end of the week. He is considering.

    You would not want to eat one of these before racquetball; I’m pretty sure you’d feel nauseous. The nutrition info is linked above (4g saturated fat). Also, the nutrition info of a Clif Bar (1g saturated fat) and a Balance Bar (3.5g saturated fat) are linked above. Those banana nut bread clif bars are good.

  4. dolphio Says:

    Cool, I’ll have to take a look. I’ve settled on a box of Powerbar Harvest for right now. Haven’t tried them yet. Figured I might as well eat something resembling what Mother Nature makes, all else considered roughly equal.

    My previous favorites, PowerBar protein plus, carb select they droped from the market. They had that new fangled “Sugar Alcohol.” The hype says its good stuff, and who am I not to trust the hype.

  5. Jesse Says:

    if he felt nauseous it might distract his opponent. although I’m pretty sure you meant to say nauseated.

  6. adrian Says:

    Jesse, I’m a much bigger fan of descriptive language and linguistics than proscriptive language and linguistics. That is to say, if it’s widely used and understood by people then it is part of the language. Which is all to say, nauseous is right in my eyes though nauseated might still be better.

  7. Jesse Says:


    that’s funny. I’ve always found you to a hard-assed, must get it exactly by the book sort of guy.

  8. Jesse Says:

    that is missing a “be”…

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